sandwich, like a person.
Is that my sandwich?
Bad dog. Bad dog.
It's him.
idiots.
Hey, boss. I didn't see
you there. How's it going?
Hey, boss.
Do you have the ransom?
No, I don't have the ransom.
Would anyone like to ask me
why I don't have the ransom?
Why don't you have the ransom?
Because they didn't pay it!
I mean, why would they pay it
when they have
not shot one frame
of film with Frizzy,
the bichon frisй?
Clearly, you have to wait for the
dog to be important to the movie,
preferably a star, before you kidnap
the dog and hold it for ransom.
Otherwise, it's just a dog.
Right.
Wait a minute.
This was your plan.
Didn't you set the schedule?
That's a lie. It was his idea.
What?
Anyway, I do have a
plan, one that will work.
Okay.
We wait.
We wait 10 days,
10 shooting days,
and then we
dognap the new dog.
Then they have to pay.
They think they
can outsmart me,
Sal Demarco, the greatest animal
trainer in the history of Hollywood,
the man who taught
a chicken to fly
and a cat to come
when it's called.
Well, they can think again.
They can think again!
Wait, chickens don't fly.
Shut up.
Well, good morning.
How did you sleep?
Such a sweet little
animal. Adorable.
But don't worry. We're
taking you to a nice new home,
and you can sleep
all you want there.
Come on. All right,
come on, doggy.
Let's go. Inside.
Hey. No. Hey. Doggy,
doggy, doggy. Doggy!
Come on. In the truck.
No, no. Come back.
Come on. Doggy!
It's Beethoven.
I'm sorry. Beethoven.
Come on. Let's go.
Come on.
I think he should
ride up front with us.
Us?
Well, if you're taking
my new best friend
to the pound, I
think I get to go.
Okay.
Fine. Fine. You
can say goodbye.
I think he should
ride up front.
Up front? Never.
Animals ride in the back.
Stay here. I'm gonna go get
Pete. I'll be right back.
Okay.
I mean it. Stay right
here in the truck.
I don't get it.
Got no charisma.
I mean, do you really
think this guy is a star?
Yes. Yes, I do.
I think you could call
him Pappy, Pappy the Pug.
Poochie? Puggy?
I think he lost his mind.
Next!
You blew it.
Okay, which one of
you mongrels is next?
Sal. What are doing here?
Well, I came to get
my things and Pete.
Pete? Pete? Don't
know Pete. Who's next?
I am.
You've got to be kidding.
But he has the
heart of a wolf.
Pete is the lizard.
What lizard?
My lizard. I see.
You lose my movie star but
you're interested in your lizard.
I didn't lose anybody.
You know I had nothing
to do with that.
All of your things are
underneath the stairwell.
If you have a lizard,
that's where it would be.
You mean you didn't
even feed him?
I've had a lot of
things on my mind. Next.
Pete.
Pete.
Pete, are you all right?
These are just
a bunch of mutts.
You're 10 times
the dog, Beethoven.
Dad found Pete.
I was worried
about you, buddy.
Is he all right?
Yeah. Pete's doing just fine.
Aren't you, Pete?
Beethoven! Pete!
Come back!
Beethoven! No!
Hey, get back here.
Where is he?
That's not even a dog.
Not technically.
But check out the personality.
It's a cat.
Yes, but a charming cat.
I think we could
call it Kitty the Cat.
That's the fattest
cat I've ever seen.
Thyroid condition.
Look, man, the
movie is about a dog.
I need a dog, not
a cat. I need a dog.
Yes, sir.
Hey. What kind
of dog was that?
Hey. Hey.
Get me out of here!
Now, that's a dog.
Humungous hairy dog.
Pete!
Watch this dog! This
dog is coming at me!
Here he comes!
Show me the dog.
Get this mangy
mutt out of here.
Doesn't he know
I'm the producer?
Get me Sal.
Get me out of this chair!
Dad, the door. He's
not gonna make it.
Pete! I'm coming, Pete.
Stop. Heel, heel!
Could you help me?
Hey, that's the producer.
Somebody help her.
Somebody help me.
Are you okay? Come on. Easy.
You okay?
Don't. Stay.
Don't, don't. Stay.
We got you. Easy. Easy.
You all right?
Phenomenal!
Eject these hoodlums
from the lot immediately!
They