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look like I write.
- Couldn't you just die?
- Yes.
- In what sense?
- The Plaza.
- Vivaldi, violins, champagne.
- He loves The Plaza.
Oh, I can see why. It's so beautiful.
You live in California?
Yes, absolutely. I love it.
- You spend time there?
- He loves it.
He does not love California, Arnold.
You don't really care, do you?
She's just making a little chit-chat.
- Ms. Detroit, could I level with you?
- Yes, I wish you would.
- This is no time to level.
- This man here...
...was so anxious to have you
he lied to me.
He told me you were doing the part.
Now, I would love to sit and chat
with you, talk to you about my play...
...if you were committed.
No, I have not committed
to do your play.
Well, I mean, I just feel a little
strange, you know.
I mean, I don't feel like I can
sell my play to somebody else.
Spent two years writing it,
I don't wanna be a salesman...
But you don't have to sell it.
I mean, your play is brilliant.
It sells itself.
- It sells itself, did you hear that?
- I heard that.
So do you want to do it or not?
Okay, what l'd like to do is level
with you, all right?
I'm scared.
I don't know if I can do it.
Mr. Travalian, I have never
worked on the stage.
I work in movies.
That's my business,
where I work.
I don't know if I could carry a lead
in a Broadway show.
I saw Sad Eyed Girls in the Park
three times.
I know when an actress is right
for the part.
- You're perfect for the part.
- Did you hear that?
Yes, I heard that.
- What are those pills?
- Aspirin. Why?
Why did you ask me to do your play?
The play I wrote is a serious play...
...written in a comic mode, all right?
It requires an actress that's gonna bring
intelligence and truth to it.
But at the same time...
...she has to be funny,
she has to act like a ditz.
Now, I know you haven't had much
stage experience, Ms. Detroit.
You've had some and Morris Finestein's
the best director with actors.
He's the best.
He's... He'll work with you.
I'll be there.
I don't know. I wouldn't be here
if I didn't think you could do it.
Yeah. I've heard that about you.
You wanna do it?
Yeah. Yes.
- You'll do it?
- Yes. Yes!
KREPLICH: You'll do it?
You'll do the play?
Lvan, she'll do the play!
You were wonderful!
You're wonderful.
He's miserable, his wife is sleeping
with an accountant.
It's a celebration! We got a star!
- I gotta get the Dickers.
- Go ahead.
Well, life is certainly great when
it works out, isn't it?
- Would you like to make a toast?
- Oh, yeah.
For the play, for you and me.
Ms. Detroit, could I call you Alice?
Alice, why do you take aspirin
with champagne?
Oh, champagne gives me a headache.
Geraldo, you're bagging garbage.
I bagged the garbage two days
in a row now!
Good. You're an expert, then.
Iggy, you're washing.
Debbie, you're drying.
- Spike?
- Eating.
Mommy was ironing my lavender dress.
She must have taken it with her.
- So wear another dress.
- That's the only dress that fits.
So wear one that doesn't fit.
Okay, we had breakfast, we're washing
dishes, we're bagging garbage.
- We're surviving, right?
GERALDO: Not me.
Yeah, we're doing beautifully. You
wanna clean the oatmeal out of this...
...or should I just buy
another one for tomorrow?
Can I ask you something?
SPIKE: What?
How come you never talk about your
mother, you never bring up her name?
- It's a little weird.
- We talk about her.
- Yeah, lots.
- Just not in front of you...
...because it gets you crazy.
- Oh, I see.
You figure she's moved out for good?
No. Absolutely not.
When she left my father,
it was for good.
Yeah, my father too. Same thing.
Same for us when she left our father.
Old Gloria's got one undeniable
goddamn record, Pop.
You can't knock her on consistency.
- Well, those other times were different.
- Why?
Isn't it time to hit the subway?
- We're
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